Friday, November 28, 2008

Road Trip Munkey!

I am working a half day today as tonight I am meeting up with Greg in Red Deer and we are driving down to Calgary for a weekend of debauchery!

I am super looking forward to this road trip, i really needed a break!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Some days I love my job

Today we are doing some upgrades to the server room across from my office.
There is a super hot electrician cub that is putting in some new breakers and plugins. I get eye candy all day today.
Imma try and get some pics of him at some point.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Webcrimes: Case 4 the revolutionary google phone from 1994

Apparently Google's revolutionary iphone killer was around back in 1994. The real mystery here is not in the horrifically low grade pixelated flash intro or in the blinking " Buy Yours now" gif these things were all rather common back in the day. No the real question is how this google phone could have existed before the company that created it even came into being in 1997.

The intro video is indeed one for the ages and begs the question, perhaps we should spent a litle less money on the umpteen usless add-on features and a bit more on a marketing budget and a camera with more thn 0.3 megapixles to take the promotional shots. But again i dont think they existed back in 1994 either.

The Flash intro is really one that needs to be seen to be believed:

Friday, November 21, 2008

We are on to you Jerry Bruckhiemer

Seriously this sounds like something out of a bad action movie

Armed Islamists will attack pirates, says militant

Totally awesome

Stolen from here.
From Terry M. I don’t know if it’s true, but I found it humorous in a geeky way.

Obviously taken from a chat session.

[hypnosis] 1. The human cell contains 75 MB of genetic information
[hypnosis] 2. A sperm 37.5 MB.
[hypnosis] 3. In a milliliter, we have 100 million sperms.
[hypnosis] On average, one ejaculation releases 2.25 ml in 5 seconds.
[hypnosis] Using basic math we can compute the bandwidth of the human male penis as:
[hypnosis] (37.5MB x 100M x 2.25)/5 = (37,500,000 bytes/sperm x 100,000,000 sperm/ml x 2.25 ml) / 5 seconds = 1,687,500,000,000,000 bytes/sec = 1,687.5 TerraBytes/sec
[Jck_true] Sweet
[Jck_true] DoS attack!!!
[hypnosis] a bukkake would probably be a DDoS then
[hypnosis] 11 men would give 17 petabytes/sec
I love gay nerds.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

My adventures out of the closet number 281

Every year I spend a whole day putting up my Baba's Christmas decorations. She loves Christmas and has at least a millions ornaments, villages wreaths and trees. Its a big job and she usually rewards me with 2 home cooked Ukrainian meals and a 20 slipped into my coat pocket when she thinks no one is looking.

A couple of weeks ago (this post) she asked me if I had a boy friend. We had a bit of a chat mostly with her asking WHYYYYYYYYY?

Well today I called her to book a time for me to come over to help put up decorations. All i have left this week is Saturday during the day so Greg would be coming over to help as well.

I mentioned this to her and she got all emotional.
Here were her list of statements and questions:
Why are you doing this?
What happend to you?
This is still going on?
You sure you wont change your mind?
Does your Mother know?
What did she say?
I bet she is not happy?
Aren't you worried about getting AIDS?
Oh why oh why?
Maybe next year you will change your mind?
Please change your mind for me?
I am soo worried about this.
Does your Dad know?
What does he think?
Then she proceeded to repeat the above questions in random order. There was only so much I could say while at work but I gave mostly one word answers and solid statements like "that is just the way it is and always has been".

I was doing pretty well till the AIDs statement. It made me realize that I have a big educational job ahead of me when it comes to my older relatives.

What is heartwarming from this whole exchange is the amount she was genuinely concerned for my well being. Her intentions are good I know, but I can't help feeling a little frustrated.

Why does every step have to be so much god damn work, like I don't have enough on my plate.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Monday, November 17, 2008

Stuffed Monkey

I just got back from a massive thai lunch with my parents. The weird thing is I almost just passed out in my co-workers office. I am rarely subject to lightheadedness. It may be due to the fact that I didn't fall asleep until 330 AM last night.

I just could not stop my brain. I used to have nights like that back when my ocd was really bad in university but they have been rare the past few years, usually showing up when I am super stressed. I am not super stressed however so I am a little confused as to why this is happening now.

I feel off somehow. I need to realign my chi or something.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Chef surprise

Greg and I and relaxing and watching the new season of Top Chef. I am totally loving the amount of bearish hotties on this season.

My current fav is the super hot and gay Richard.

Friday, November 14, 2008

The Queer Awakening

The internets have been abuzz with the new gay rights movement. Wockner is appropriately dubbing it activism 4.0.

This is something I have written and thought about increasingly over the last few years. The maturing of social networking sites and the proliferation of living news aggregators (bloggers) have really allowed gays all over the world to connect. More so now than ever I feel like we are a community connected using this fantastic series of tubes ;)

This interconnectivity both anonymous, intimate and instantaneous has made it increasingly hard to ignore the things that are occurring to our brothers and sisters out there. From gays being hunted down and slaughtered in Iraq to a gay bashing in Ottawa; these events in past times would have been likely just slipped into obscurity. Now these events become part of our daily news feeds. Instead of hearing about that drag queen that was beaten up outside the local gay bar from friends or even more rarely the local news media, we can learn about all of the things (both good and bad) happening to the people in our global community all day every day delivered by Queers for Queers.

Its not that the screams for help are getting louder it is just that they are multiplying by the thousands rising in a crescendo and becoming harder to avoid with each passing day.

For 20 years we have been separating ourselves by age, HIV status, pant size, and the presence of facial hair. These subcultures and schisms have led to the fact that many of us under 30's have very little insight into our gay history or the tragedy and trailblazers that have allowed us the freedoms we currently enjoy. Having bloggers like joe.my.god and rex wockner (to name a few of many) have given us millennial gays a historical and often heartbreaking perspective that just was not reasonably culturally accessible even 5 years ago.

It wasn't that this my generation of Queers is lazy or uninterested we had the tools and increasingly the information we just lacked a universal cause, something that would piss us off enough to unite us.

Proposition 8 crystallized all of these elements and for the first time in my lifetime, I am having lengthy conversations about activism and politics with my peers. My generation has had it fairly easy up until now. We have lived in fairly tolerant times. It is one thing to be attacked by some douchebag on Fox news who has no affect on my life, it is another thing entirely to see the rights of 18000 of your brothers and sisters stripped away in front of you.

The mormon church has woken us up and in the long run they will learn to regret it after all no one fucks with our Ellen and gets away with it.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

That was interesting?

The devs apparently have decided that I am not a good manager. Even though they have shown that they are incapable of managing there own project.

Bill our vp is siding with me he has seen the level of the work they had done. I am still super frustrated.

Fucking contractors...

impending dooooooom

I couldnt sleep last night. Partially because I worked out too hard on my home gym and now every inch of my body is incredibly sore and partially because I had two huge meetings today.

The first one went really well. The other one is happening as I type this. Why am I not in it?

Good question imaginary audience, let me explain.

We are having some massive difficulties with our developer. This was my first big development project and the company we contracted out is not filling there end of the deal. Fingers are starting to be pointed. Today was supposed to be a meeting between me our vp and the ceo of the dev company. It turns out that the devs don't want me there.

I know they are going to try and pin the blame on me for something. I am not worried about what they are going to say, more annoyed at they had the gall to do that and that things have gotten this bad?

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Where I have been

I have not been posting much. Its not that I have not had things to say. In fact I have had a million things to say but no time or real focus to say them.

All owners in my condo complex are going to have to pay a 10 grand levey over the next five years. Additionally my condo fees are going to be going up. Money is going to be very tight for the next while.

I managed to learn adobe after effects and create this from scratch in 4 days for a client. Granted I worked like 80 hours that week on it.

I had a fantastic Halloween. Greg went as doggy-style and i went as Eor from Winnie the pooh in a 5 year olds costume (it was tiiiight).

Ryan and Jim my old roomates and Andrew threw a surprise party for me last weekend. They invited a ton of people that I don't get to see very often. It was amazing! It definitely picked up my spirits. I have such a fantastic group of friends.

Big things are happening at work. The next few months are going to be crazy.

Ok I am pooped I will make the effort to post every day for the rest of the week.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Webcrimes: Case 3 The Amorous Pisces

I found this gem while searching a webdesign portfolio of all places. Yes someone was indeed proud of this webcrime.

First of all I have a major hate on for splash pages. It makes no sense to put up a wall between you and your customers. It is rare that there is ever a good reason for a splash page.

Splash pages should be used in these rare occasions to elicit some sort of emotional connection or deliver a specific message (usually in flash).
Now I am not sure that this will elicit any kind of emotional reactions from anyone other than someone with a fish fetish so ultimately having a large splash page of a fish humping a rock is not so good.

On second thought perhaps an aquarium store should be advertising to fish fetishists, its easy money.
Check out the full site here.

On the election to the south

CNN's camera work is making me dizzy.

know hope, and gravol apparently.