Friday, January 29, 2010

Catcher in the whatsit?

I am I really the only person who has not read Catcher in the rye?? Seriously thats all i have heard about the last few days.

I am clearly an uncultured bore.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

High and tight

So I originally had this post done up last night but for some reason the blogger iphone app choked and did not save it.

I cut my hair on Tuesday and it has taken some time but I have gotten used to my new look. I have been cuting my own hair for about a year now, mostly to save some money and due to the fact that all the hair places around oliver seem to be outrageously priced or are terrible (Screw you First Choice Haircutters). It is not for the faint of heart to cut ones own hair (or for the intelligent for that matter). There have been some close calls but things always seemed to turn out ok. Until Tuesday that is. I may have swiped off a bit much in the back and as a result I had to go shorter than I ever had before.

People have been very kind and complimentary but i think they are just being nice. It is still kinda shocking to see it. The plus side is I can now wear tuques without worrying about messing up my hair.

So what do you guys think?
(Sorry about the blurry pic I guess I am not quite ready for my guyswithiphones debut.)

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Why the ipad (and iphone) sucks but will be popular regardless

Apple released it's new shiny toy today. I think it is really lacking in a few features that will eventually come out in future versions and steve jobs will treat them as if they were miracles of modern engineering rather than standard features on any other fucking device.

Now it should be noted that some of these issues are shared with my iphone complaints but some are not related to the OS.

So here is my list of things this should have and will have within the next two years but be treated as premium features even though they are not.
  1. No built in camera of any kind
  2. No built in memory card reader
  3. No standard video out
  4. No USB
  5. No multitasking so you can only run one program at a time. Seriously Microsoft tried to do this with netbook versions of windows 7 which only allowed 3 simultaneous processes and the internets totally lost their shit over it. Other than the jailbreaking crowd I bet you do not hear a peep about this because this is apples MO get people used to a limited feature and treat the limitation itself as a bonus.
  6. No accessible file system so you will not be able to back this bitch up without a pc or mac with itunes on it to sync your files. I don't want a program that syncs my files I want the option to do whatever I want with my files. Like throw them on a usb key etc. Plus iphoto is shit.
My folks are in the market for a device exactly like an ipad. One that is basically for web surfing and email with some media thrown in. However the items above mean I can not suggest that they buy one. I am sure it will sell a billion units to people that don't care about listening to a webcast while typing up a report or chatting online while viewing a movie but I think with the amount of engineering money and know how that was put into this thing the 6 items above should be no brainers.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Webcrimes Case 9 : The case of the big bust!

The fella stumbled upon the biggest webcrime singular bust i have come across in a long time. These guys are prolific! Its not really that any one of the sites they have created is geocities bad but that each one seems so year 2000 bland and derivative. Splashpages??? really? Is it 2001?

The worst is the homepage however that looks like a bridal planning company page or one for a party planner.
Can i ask for an internet moratorium on cursive fonts on webpages? While we are at it please please no more tickertape headlines unless they are dynamically updated rss feeds.

I did the same thing back in the day but there is no place or reason for it on a modern webpage. Didn't you know handwriting is dead anyway?

Enjoy this screen shot and be sure to check out the portfolio.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Music for a Chilly monday

Calgary was an awesome time. The drive down was a bit horrendous but we managed to make it through in just over 4 hours. Mostly thanks to Anna's responsible and awesome driving skillz. As most of you know I have pretty bad traveling anxiety and snow and ice on highways only make it worse. Thank god i was able to keep myself busy playing on my iphone, which I am loving more and more every day.

The party was super fun. Great food and great company. Jimmy who's birthday it was has tentatively good taste in music. By this I mean he tends to find some really awesome Diamond in the rough type singers but with that he also likes a lot of things that sound like cats in heat.

Todays monday music item is not of the cat in heat variety. Jim or as he was dubbed or known by his new drag name Lady Jimmy Blah Blah pointed me to this fine singer a little while ago and his kickin playlist on saturday reminded me I needed to post about her.

Think Feist and Sarah Mclachlan with a disco/soul vibe. Florence + the machine have released a really exceptional disk called Lungs. I have been listening to it on my iphone the last couple of weeks and it gets better and better each time.

So enjoy some Florence + the machine: Rabbit Heart (raise it up)

*update* this video below will play in Canada

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Road Trip

We are off to Calgary tonight for Jim's birthday. It should be a run road trip but I am worried at how shitty the roads look :(
Bleh!
Pics and shenanigans to follow!

paaaaathetic

So i have had some vodka. I opened up this window with a fantastic blog post in mind. However I looked at my news feeds and that provided enough time to make me and the fella both forget what I was going to blog about. It was going to be funny and fantastic i know this because we both thought it was a funny idea.

But since we are both drunks I will leave you all with this. My bf is a dirty ho who scandalously will kiss both straight girls and straight boys without actually earning me a dime. lame!

Friday, January 22, 2010

On Growing an Apparent Vagina

How sad is it that I am more excited about the upcoming Lilith Fair concert lineup than I am about Coachella. It may be because im getting old and I dont know who 80% of the the Coachella lineup is. I realize this means i have to forfeit and music cred I have painstakingly built up the last 10 years. Its not like i get a chance to watch the wedge anymore anyway :(

Now it should be noted that my chances of seeing coachella are 0 and lilith is coming to edmonton. It may also have to do with the fact the HEART is on the Lilith lineup. Now I know not all artists play at every venue but i would give my left nut to hear Crazy On You and Barracuda live!

Not to mention the Gossip is on the tour as well. When am I ever gonna get a chance to see them in Edmonton EVER!?!?!? Thats right I never would.

So I will suck it up, buy and wear fair trade sarong built buy a lesbian commune in Malaysia. I will grow my hair long. Luckily I already don't shave my armpits or legs so I will fit in in that respect. I will nurture my new ovaries and speak with words like "gaia", "Paternal Male Hegemony" and "the sociopolitical oppression of the phallus". I will sing kumbaya with my new found sisters to the dulcet tones of a Norah Jones.

Yes I will do all of this and more at Lilith Fair, but when HEART comes out on that stage you better fucking believe I am gonna rock out with my cock out!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Musical memory flashback

Over the weekend the fella and I were shopping for sheets ect for our fantastic new memory foam king sized bed (yes i am a size queen errr king in this case). While we were running around looking for deals on sheets, which i still feel are outrageously priced, we were listening to a live cd from our lady peace. Now I admit back in the day I did not have the best musical taste. When your first cd is the sign by Ace of Base you know you are in trouble.

I had forgotten how many great tunes they released before I fell out of love with them for more alternative dancier fare. My favorite cd they released is Spiritual Machines which was a concept album based on the book The Age of Spiritual Machines by futurist Ray Kurzweil. I remember listening to it over and over in my room in 2000.

Here is In Repair the first single from that album.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Pleases girls completely

For all of my non Canadian readers I feel this post requires some background information. The National Film Board is a government branch dedicated nurturing Canadian artists and film makers. Often this takes form in bizarre and wonderful animations.

The cbc would play these things between programs as filler. There is not a Canadian child around who lived in the 80's who has not heard the log driver's waltz which is probably the most famous of these short films. I think most of us could have sung it off by heart without difficulty before the age of 5.

I was saddened to find out via Simon that folk singer Kate McGarrigle (mother to rufus and martha wainwright), the voice from this classic piece of Canadian passed away today. Sleep well Kate and thank you for the fond memories.

So please enjoy The Log driver's Waltz (also the NFB has a lot of it's catalog online you should really check it out!).

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Munkey Want

This makes my inner star trek dork jizz in his ill fitting unstylish pants.

Friday, January 15, 2010

One classy fuckin mo

Last night the fella and a few of our friends ended up going to see the Edmonton Symphony Orchestra at the winspear center. I had never been before and was not sure what to expect. They ESO has a deal called pulse 88 on right now that allows young people to purchase tickets for about half price.

We got all dressed up and spent a few hours among edmontons well heeled cultural elites. While classical music is not really my style (i have trouble connecting to it on an emotional level) I really enjoyed it.

I don't think i will be getting seasons tickets or anything like that but I will for sure be going back.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Why I stopped designing websites for people

This is brilliant.

I used to love doing websites. They were a great way to grow what little design skill I had into something marketable. Unfortunately people are idiots with terrible taste and delusions that they have excellent taste. It managed to break me down and ruin any love I had for it.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Passive Agressive Disgusting notes

Its kinda hilarious the random shit you find when you clean out your old phone!
This was from a change room at a bluenotes or bootlegger or some sort of young adult/teen cheap clothes store in west ed. Lets just say it did not inspire me to buy the jeans I was trying on.

Teenagers are fucking disgusting.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Munkey Want

Yes i like them wide really wide.

Oh those crazy breeders

I have a lot of friends that are straight. For many of them Greg and I are the only close gay friends they have.

My peers and I seem to be approaching an age when people shack up and get married. I find it kinda funny that we have been getting invites to both the bridal showers and the stag parties. I guess gays do make the party after all. It makes for double the party time for me so I am not complaining.

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

All of me.

All the stress from work last year has taken it's toll on my body. Bad environments and bad habits have been really doing some awful things to me. This time last year I weighed 155 pounds. I wasn't perfect by any means but i fit all of my clothes and I felt healthy which was important for me.Far too much eating out, late night snacking and sitting on my ass has caused me to balloon out to 180 pounds. I don't like this and my ulcer likes this even less.

We have a mexico trip booked for March and I am going to try and drop as much weight as I can so I will be fit enough to enjoy the outdoors. I am shooting for 20 pounds gone in two months. Now some may think that is a lot but my body seems to be able to shed weight fairly easily with adjusted diets and exercise. I am also hoping this will help me and my ulcer (who i have taken to calling cthulhu) get along better. If anyone knows of a good routine that I can do from home ( i have a weight bench) that will help me turn some of this fat into muscle I would love to hear from you.

So here are some shots of me in all of my chubby glory. It looks like the pics have been stretched horizontally alas they have not.

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Stephen Harper sucks and here is why

Rick Mercer my personal god of the moment says it better than I ever could why Canada no longer has democracy because off the conservative party.
Hat tip to Cracked Crystal Ball II.

Im not sure what that makes me

Yesterday I:
Got new jewelery for my ear piercing
Got three new shirts from threadless.com
Wore my kicky transformers hoodie
Went to the apple store and played with my new iphone to make others jealous
Booked a trip with the fella to Mexico for march!
and now I am blogging about it.

Does this make me a hippster wannabe, a douche a dork or just a tragic consumerist whore?

Sunday, January 03, 2010

Gear UP! Edmonton Sports gear and Uniform Fetish party

The BEEF Bear bashes are going so well that I have decided to do a new party night this one dedicated to guys who are into sports gear, uniforms, rubber and leather.

Gear Up! Fetish night is happening on January 30th at Boots bar 8pm. Hope to see some of you guys there! Bear party rules apply of course no line no cover and guys in gear and uniform are very very welcome!

Here is the facebook event link.

Digital echos from the past

I have been going through my old bookmarks to clean them out for syncing to my new iphone. Yes i am officially 100% mac douche now. YAY. It's funny the things you collect in your bookmarks. I found this sketchy dating compatibility test that from back in the day that i used to gauge my relationships by. I decided to give it one more try before deleting it. Turned out to be fairly good.

There was a time where I took these tests super seriously. Ahh to be 19 and emotionally immature and kinda crazy again...

Aaron
&
Greg

80% Compatible

♥ Aaron and Greg have been romantically-together for awhile now, indicating a degree of compatibility. Similar personality descriptions are a plus. Aaron may complain that Greg is too sloppy. Their astrological signs are in harmony, though, which is a plus. They share a favorite season, and that is good. And their views on children are similar. Money differences may cause relationship stress. Both are sexually-uninhibited. Overall, Aaron and Greg are quite compatible. There are a few rough spots, but nothing that cannot be overcome. ♥

Take the Dating Compatibility Test